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1. |
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Way down south there’s some bastards on an island
And I ain’t talkin’ ‘bout Australia
They’ll crucify you, they’ll beat and jail ya
Like a street dog they’ll impale ya
They say that war is crazy but I disagree
It makes the most sense to me
No one wants to know the truth and hear my brave message
Let’s teach those bastards a lesson
We’ll burn down all their jungles, we’ll topple all their forts
We’ll turn their beaches into glass
We’ll dry up their rivers and block all their ports
We’ll make ‘em learn our sports
Our politicians won’t take out this tyrant
Just ‘cause it might get violent
But I refuse to remain so peaceful and silent
Let’s start a war on Christmas Island
They’ve got a population of fourteen hundred and two
Our big old bombs will turn them to goo
To protect the shores of Kentucky and Tennessee too
We’ll turn their brains to stew
Our politicians won’t take out this tyrant
Just ‘cause it might get violent
But I refuse to remain so peaceful and silent
Let’s start a war on Christmas Island
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2. |
Burger or Plum
02:20
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I don’t need napkins, I don’t need a thing
Just some big old beer, Chicken a la king
Some pigs in a blanket with a little bit of zing
And I couldn’t say no to a couple chicken wings
Mozzarella sticks rolled in old bread crumbs
I know it ain’t healthy even though I’m dumb
Wanna find a log and sit there on my bum
Take a big bite and scream yum yum yum
I could be smart if I wasn’t so dumb
I like eating food because food is fun
I’m going cross eyed while I’m sucking my thumb
If it’s a Burger or a plum, I’m screaming yum yum yum
Been down on my luck can’t catch a break
But at least I’ll always have salisbury steak
Got a beautiful woman that’s my Amore
But she don’t compare to chicken cacciatore
I could be smart if I wasn’t so dumb
I like eating food because food is fun
I’m going cross eyed while I’m sucking my thumb
If it’s a Burger or a plum, I’m screaming yum yum yum
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3. |
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Oh prince of darkness, I heard you played varsity football at Scholomance
I bet all the cheerleaders at black magic school wanted to dance
But did you let ‘em?
I heard the football team was pretty bad, sorry for your losses
I’d ask you to marry me in a church but I know how you hate crosses
Would you eat my spaghetti if I don’t use garlic?
I know you like to fly, do you get carsick?
I don’t care if I can’t see myself in the mirror
Your dark dark coffin helps me see a little clearer
If we go camping would you bite me by the lake?
Would you be offended if I prop our tent with stakes?
I can adjust to your schedule, I used to work nights
I promise I don’t bite
Now if someone asks about my neck I’ll say it’s mosquitos Picture us in Transylvania sharing Romanian burritos
Would you eat my spaghetti if I don’t use garlic?
I know you like to fly, do you get carsick?
No, I don’t care if I can’t see myself in the mirror
Your dark dark coffin helps me see a little clearer
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4. |
My Car Don't Go
02:52
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I’ll protect you baby, and I will never run
Neither will your car, that’s the problem, hun’
Come on baby, I’ll make you so spoiled
You can’t even keep your engine well oiled
Fallen out of love and
Feeling low because
My car don’t go
Now we’re out of gas
Walking to and fro
Babe we just won’t last
Look me in the eyes babe, I’ll never tell you no
That don’t mean a thing if you can’t get your car to go
Baby can’t you see, I don’t need a car if you’re always with me
That remains to be seen, there’s other guys with car keys in their jeans
Filled with burning desire
Why’d I light my car on fire?
Fallen out of love and
Feeling low because
My car don’t go
Now we’re out of gas
Walking to and fro
Babe we just won’t last
Babe, don’t go
Now we’re out of gas
Walking to and fro
I’m afraid we just won’t last
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5. |
The Sun's Birthday
02:14
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The Earth takes a year to circle the sun
Along the way we have lots of fun
Why’s it take a whole dang year, you say?
That way we’ll remember what’s the sun’s birthday
Oh big yellow sun above the bay
I heard today’s a special day
I bought you sunglasses, Bans of Ray
How we love to play on your Birthday Day
When the sun goes away we see twinkling stars
I stack up my blocks S-T-A-R
My friend runs them over with his wooden car
R-A-T-S they spell from afar
Big yellow sun above the bay
I heard today’s a special day
I bought you sunglasses, Bans of Ray
How we love to play on your Birthday Day
The Sun ate his veggies to be strong in the sky
Goes away at night ‘cause he’s a little shy
Loves to say good morning, hates to say goodbye
Big yellow sun above the bay
I heard today’s a special day
I bought you sunglasses, Bans of Ray
How we love to play on your Birthday Day
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6. |
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There comes a time when the times must change
And that time is the ‘60s
Politics are changing, weed is kinda new
And civil rights are too
There comes a place where everything happens
And that place is Manhattan
The Beatles are coming, Vietnam too
What are we gonna do?
Now this is a decade that you can’t forget
If you’re here, you will remember it
Times are changing, Bay of Pigs will be soon
We might even go to the moon!
The culture’s important, and will last forever
We’ve got lots of new brands too
Peace is king, feelings of love are in the air
And don’t forget United Pineapple of Delaware
Now this is a decade that you can’t forget
If you’re here, you will remember it
Times are changing, Bay of Pigs will be soon
We might even go to the moon!
Now this is a decade that you can’t forget
If you’re here, you will remember it
It’s a time of turmoil, a time of change
Hope nothing bad happens to JFK
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Episode One recommends:
Listen to Charles' band
go to album
instrumental album from charles & dan boeckner
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